when age is catching up with me, I don’t feel happy.
cousins who used to play with me during my childhood are all starting to settle down and getting married. Some of them are even with a baby already. Time do passes very quickly, unknowingly i’m 21 already. standard 5 is ten years back the time where i don’t even get worried with examination and my concept of entertainment is still cartoons especially mickey mouse. where attending funeral doesn’t happen every couple years and nobody around me goes into the hospital often.
right now, all i’m afraid is people dearly to me. I’m really afraid that sickness would get near them. kidney failure, cancer and god-knows-what-sickness-old-age-get.
i dislike going funeral, i don’t like the sad atmosphere there.
everytime i sleep, i’m afraid when i wake up something might happen. I know this is getting abit too sensitive but i just can’t help it. i also know i must start to take care of what i eat, or else it would be people dearly to me starts to worry about me. i’m hanging on there. trust me.
someone dearly to me would be going for an operation on Monday. i just hope that the operation is just a small one and doesn’t have any risk. People who are older in my concept has risk. that’s why i’m afraid. 😦